When you’re davening you’re talking to….

My kids have a CD with a song that goes “When you’re davening you’re talking to Hashem…it’s a very special thing to be talking to a KING….” Sometimes, though, I like to think that when I am davening I am also talking to a FRIEND.

Why do I say this? Because when we think of G-d as a King, although it engenders the appropriate awe and fear in us that should help us focus during davening and should stop us from talking to neighbors, it also makes Hashem seem and feel far away. How often do any of us ever talk to a King?? But the truth is that Hashem is also meant to be thought of as a confidant, someone whom we can tell anything to-big or small-and someone who we can talk to all the time whenever something is on our mind. The Yerushalmi in Brachot 9:1 says "תפילה לעני כי יעטוף [לפני ה' ישפוך שיחו] – כאדם המשיח באוזן חבירו והוא שומע.". When we daven it is as if we are whispering in Hashem’s ear.

We all have different types of friends. There are the friends we talk to a few times a year and then there are the friends we talk to and text multiple times a day. The difference between them is that the friends we talk to a few times a year only get to hear the big things going on in our lives, the things we catch them up on, and similarly they don’t know about or get to be involved in the day to day ups and downs we experience. It would be hard to turn to a friend like this one day and expect them to be involved in all aspects of our life if we had not been including them all along. The relationship is more distant.

But then there are those friends who know every little thing that happens to us each day. We are really, really close and can talk about anything. When we daven, what kind of friend do we want Hashem to be? Is G-d supposed to be different than a friend? Can we and should we expect that we can carry ourselves differently with Him? What do you think? I would love to hear your comments.