Developmental Disabilities

From Zahava Rothschild:
I have a question that I thought of today in Tanach class in response to something we learned in Sefer Devarim. The Abarbanel says that the purpose of Moshe's wrapping up his huge speech at the end of his life in the way that he does was to show that the purpose of life is to not only do the mitzvot, but to also love and fear G-d in the biggest way possible. My question is, that if that is what our purpose is, to find Gd and love Him, fear Him, and serve Him, then what about people who are mentally disabled and do not have the capacity to visualize Gd in any way. It seems to me that they are never able to achieve this higher level of purpose in the world that all Jews are supposedly meant to fulfill? Thank you!

Response: So Zehava, as soon as I read your question I knew I wanted to claim it, and start to form some kind of answer. Maybe it is because my brother has a developmental disability, or because of my years of work at Camp HASC and Yachad, or my work with all kinds of patients in my psychology career with cognitive limitations. In any event, this is my take and some thoughts from the guests at my home one night who I shared your question with.
Ill start with a story:

When I worked in Yachad, there was an advisor from South Africa, who is now a renowned Rav, named Johnny Shippel, who had an incredible experience on a Yachad Shabbaton at Columbia University. I wasn’t there, but this is how it was explained to me. So if I get it wrong forgive me. Rabbi Shippel (Johnny) had been speaking at the (always moving) end of Shabbos time, about fulfilling our purposes in life. A Yachad member at the moving closing Shalosh Seudot ceremony asked Johnny with great and heartfelt emotion “I don’t understand, I have some many limitations, I can’t do this, and this that you mentioned, so what could possibly be my purpose in this world?” Johnny answered that he didn’t really have an exact answer since we don’t know our purposes in life, but maybe just you being you and asking this question right now is part of your purpose in life. Well, this all became more of a story, when this Yachad member died suddenly that week, and hundreds of Columbia students came to the funeral. The family wondered who these people were that they had never met before and Johnny explained the story that had ensued that past Shabbat, where that Yachad member had clearly added to at least a part of his purpose by touching and reaching so many students with his powerful question.

So with that as a backdrop, let’s get to your query. You explain that the Abarbanel says that purpose of life as taught through Moshe Rabbeinu is to love and fear G-d in the biggest way possible. Sounds true right…. in fact my husband and I named our son Ovadya Avraham, because Ovadya was known to be the greatest Oved Hashem (fear of G-d), and Avraham the greatest Ohev Hashem (love of G-d), and we wanted to cosmically give him a leg up on exactly that mission! But let’s challenge your question on two levels… One how does one define “finding G-d” and Two, does G-d have the same purpose for everyone?

Let’s start with one. Who is the one defining what fear and love of G-d is? How does one really know how someone visualizes, fears, loves, connects with or understands G-d? Knowledge of G-d is such a deep thing; everyone can connect with that on a different way.
At the farthest extreme, say for someone who is severely cognitively limited, we cannot really understand what they feel about G-d, about the world around them, about their sense of self or reality, but that doesn’t mean that they do not have feeling about G-d’s presence. When you move up the functionality spectrum and you really talk to people with great limitations “mentally” it can be quite amazing the richness of spiritual life they express. So what may be your heights of finding G-d may not be the same as someone with severe impairment, but they may be both equally valid.

Two: G-d’s plan for each of us is so individual. Rav Dessler z”L in Strive for Truth Michtav M’Eliyahu writes about the Nekudat Habechira or “choice point.” This idea, explains how Hashem can judge every person using the same measurement. Really he posits, Hashem doesn’t. If for you not eating shrimp is a given, and is not a challenge for you at all, than it is not in your choice point, you have achieved that, but if for you, remembering to say your brachot is a challenge, or you are always forgetting that you just ate meat and you slip up and eating dairy, or if you are struggling with speaking nicely to your mom, that is in your choice point and that is where Hashem is watching and judging your achievement!

Maybe the same holds true for life goals and Hashem’s gauge for judging our ultimate success at our life mission. Every person’s intelligence, family attitudes, abilities experiences shape our spiritual goal as well. For you Zehava, you can reach one type of growth and discovery of Hashem, and for someone who can’t verbalize or read the nature of her spiritual mission might be something totally different.

We don’t really know these answers they are so deep and mysterious, but I hope this gives you some food for thought as we all continue to work on fulfilling our unique missions in life. To add a final thought from a tenth grader, Alison Alt, who recently quoted something to me from the Chazon Ish via Rabbi Tatz, when one is really fulfilling their mission, there is no sadness for that person in the world. Let’s hope that we all can achieve their goal…
Also my parents just donated two books to the Maayanot Library called “Chinuch Meyuchad B’Rei HaYahadut” Translated as Special Ed through the Lens of Yahadut, one in English and one in Hebrew. They are written by Rav Yoel Schwartz and were commissioned for my brother’s Bar Mitzvah. There is some more on this subject in there for you to look at! I’d be happy to continue this conversation if you want at any point.
Rayzel Yaish