Pure Chesed

Over Thanksgiving break, my husband (a rabbi, but not of a shul) was asked to perform a funeral that Friday for the 104-year-old mother of a woman in my hometown. Normally my hometown rabbi would have done the funeral, but since he was going away for Thanksgiving, and since the service and burial were to be in New Jersey, my hometown rabbi asked my husband to fill in. Some background: In order to show kavod ha-met, it is proper to have a minyan at the cemetary so the family can say kaddish, and also to have Jews do the actual physical labor of burying the dead. The woman who passed away didn't have so many relatives, and many of the male relatives were kohanim. Not so many people would be at this funeral, and those who would were either quite elderly themselves, or kohanim who could not come into the cemetary. In short, my husband needed some able-bodied men to help him, both with the minyan and with digging. Thursday, he posted a request on "Teaneck shuls," the message board for Orthodox north Bergenites. I was sure no one would respond. Who would want to give up a Friday vacation day (a gift given to spend sleeping, with family, shopping or even learning) to come to stand in a cemetary in the rain, hear speeches about a woman they didn't know, and dig dirt? But my husband was confident - and he was right! Eight people - strangers to him - emailed to offer to help! He needed 4 people in the end, and he got them. These people did not know the woman who passed away, anyone in her family, or even my husband. They weren't doing it as a favor to any person at all - just pure chesed. I couldn't believe it, but my husband said "That's what Yidden do."